In traditional African societies, mourning practices and rites have cultural significance, with women bearing the brunt of these rites.
In most African countries, widows are subjected to more difficult rules and degrading customs around diet, personal hygiene, sexual activity and social exclusion.
Here are seven shocking widowhood practices:
Sleeping with a corpse
According to the customs of the Akan community in southern Ghana, widows are expected to remain with their deceased spouse until his burial due to the belief that the departed soul may come back and engage in sexual activity with them, which could cause permanent infertility. The widows provide food and gold and dress in a particular way when they are in mourning.
Being stark naked
In the northern region of Ghana, widows are required to remain naked indoors while using only leaves to cover their privates. They are not allowed to leave the house unless they are carrying a calabash, which is a memorial to the departed. If they must go out in the open, they do so naked and have a special drink with an elderly woman accompanying them.
Crying from morning till night
Among the Baule people of Cote d'Ivoire, both men and women have the same bereavement rites. For widows and widowers, the period of mourning only lasts three months.
The surviving spouse fasts during this period, dresses in particular attire, and cries nonstop from dawn to dusk. One wonders what happens when they have run out of tears.
They are to be segregated and refrain from talking to anyone other than another widow. They must not have sex during the mourning period, and they must relinquish their property to the deceased's relatives. When it comes to sex, the Baule people are more lenient, widows and widowers can resume regular sexual relations after the grieving period.
Proving that they did not kill their husbands
As a widow in South Eastern Nigeria, not only are you mourning his death, you are proving your innocence.
Among the Igbos in Nigeria, a man's death puts the sisters-in-law's powers on display. They typically insist on proof that the woman did not come from another family to murder a member of their family to transfer the wealth from their family to her own.
Some of these tests include sleeping with the deceased corpse in a room or a graveyard, as well as any other tests they deem fit. Her hair is also cut, and she is only allowed to wear mourning clothes. If she refuses, it means she killed her husband.
Sitting on the ground, not bathing, and being treated with contempt
According to Igbo tradition, widows are not allowed to enter marketplaces, farms, or streams to gather water during the first 28 days of seclusion. Before returning to regular activity, rituals must be completed.
A typical Igbo widow must refrain from bathing during this period of isolation before the burial of her deceased spouse. She must also sit on the ground while being fed by another widow. Every plate and cooking utensil that she uses is disposed of.
The widow must abstain from sex and pregnancy during the second year of seclusion, because it is taboo for her to get pregnant.
Sexual cleansing
Widows have to undergo necessary cleansing in some cultures in Kenya, Tanzania, Zambia, Zimbabwe, and Malawi. A widow can attain purification by engaging in sexual intercourse with her deceased husband's brother, another family member, or a specialised village purifier.
This ritual is believed to absolve her of any wrongdoing or sins associated with her previous marriage before the widow's brother or another relative of her late husband proposes marriage. A woman who doesn't perform these rites is ostracised. Sex is also unprotected.
Rape
Aja ani is the final stage of Igbo culture's widowhood ritual, where a widow is escorted by an Aja ani or Nwa nri to perform a ritual for her. It is expected that the widow will have sex with the priest or dwarf. It doesn't matter if she doesn't consent.
This is done to cut off her connections to her deceased husband as it is thought that any man who tries to sleep with her before the ritual will die. The umuada patrilineal sisters bathe her after the ritual is done before she goes back home.
It is important to bring attention to these customs and demand their eradication.