Depending on your relationship, social media and texting habits may be individual or shared business. But those habits can reveal a lot about your partner and your relationship. Emotions, priorities, hidden personality traits, and motivations your partner doesn't show can easily shine through these digital habits.
Should their conduct on their social media affect you? If you are asking that question then it might be affecting you already. But here are five instances you should be concerned about.
So the next time you go through your partner's social media feeds, look out for these behaviours.
Suggestive selfies/videos
An occasional skin-revealing picture of them at the gym, beach or in an outfit for date night or a night out with friends is no cause for concern. Excessive posting of revealing and suggestive pictures, on the other hand, can signal that they are yearning for attention.
"If your partner posts overly sexualized photos, it could indicate poor boundaries and respect for a monogamous relationship, leading to trust concerns," Lisa Lawless, PhD, a clinical psychotherapist and CEO of Holistic Wisdom told BestLife.
If you are concerned or bothered by this behaviour, don't become accusatory rather approach your partner with curiosity and compassion to figure out what is going on. You might need to figure out boundaries when it comes to posting that kind of content.
They don't post about you at all
Some people are detailed about their relationships on social media while others prefer their personal life private. If your partner is the active kind on social media posting different aspects of their life but doesn't include you anywhere, that can warrant a conversation.
They may not be comfortable with public scrutiny of the relationship or they may want to maintain a certain image on their social media. The worst-case scenario is that they don't want the other people they are dating to know about you.
Over-posting about your relationship on social media
Excessive inclusion on their social media can be just as bad a sign as excluding you. Your relationship may come under stress if your partner has a high need for validation and approval. This need can show up in excessive posts about the relationship, and borderline obsession with snapping each moment of your relationship.
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Some people can't help but boast about their romance and relationship bliss. But if it starts to bother you and borders on violation of privacy, you may want to talk about boundaries. On the other hand, this obsessive posting can be a way for them to avoid being intimate with you in intimate moments.
Common photos with an unknown person
You know most people in your partner's circles and those you don't know are rare occurrences. But suddenly there's a John/Jane Doe making frequent appearances in pictures with your partner on social media.
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This behaviour can indicate that they are emotionally investing in someone else. However, you shouldn't jump to conclusions but instead, engage your partner in non-confrontational and open conversation.
False presentations of your shared reality
A flaming red flag is posting pictures that contradict or misrepresent the reality of their life or your relationship with them. If they make their life or relationship seem a certain way that you are not privy to, you may want to have a conversation.
Filters and editing are one thing, but unrealistic photos and posts that are downright false can indicate deep insecurities and an absence of authenticity in their life and relationship.